A swarm of termites was flying around my classroom after lunch, landing on students, landing on me. "Unless you're Pinocchio," I said, "you have nothing to worry about." My students were doing presentations, and we were smashing termites mid-flight. One presenter had a termite crawling on him, so the audience was shrieking and squealing. I had to pick the termite off him and squish it between my fingers.
This is what it's really like to teach public school.